I put on my fleece-lined jacket and step through the cold breeze that nudges me to the end of the driveway and wait. It has been a long day.
Even longer for my boy.
His teacher rode with him, her arm comforting him as his eyes leaked wet down his face. His eyes are red, his face so sad.
He stands up and and leans in to me as I squeeze him tight.
"He's had a rough afternoon" his teacher says. "I think it's just catching up with him."
I just feel his sadness. His overwhelming sadness.
We walk into the house and with a voice straining to pull through his tightened neck, he asks for the iPad.
He walks straight to his room, covers himself with his blanket and cries, sweet sad tears.
I just rub his back. I have no words.
He asks for the iPad, again and I show him it is right beside him.
He lays his head on me and we just sit. I wait for him to talk and he rubs the wet off his eyes. "Blow-dry eyes please?".
I get the hair dryer and blow dry his eyes. His face starts to relax, and the stress blows away with the air and tears. His eyes closed, he looks like he did when riding with Daddy in the old white Miata with the hood down.
He plays with the iPad, and slowly gets back to his happy place.
45 minutes later, his body has calmed and I hear his giggling coming through smiling eyes...and the call of the peacock. He does an excellent imitation!
It is so hard, to not know what to do, or what happened, or what is wrong when your child is so distraught. I didn't know what to do, but I felt the whispers to not talk. Just be there. I felt the pull in my heart to do whatever he asks and when he asked for blow-drying his eyes, I just did it.
"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." Isaiah 30:21
I didn't know that blowing dry his eyes would blow away the hard parts of the day and lead him to his happy place, but God did.
When we hit rock bottom, God holds us. And He rubs our back and comforts us and just lets us be with Him. He knows just what we need, even if it's blow-drying our tears away.
He holds our tears in his bottle and they are precious to him even more than my boy's tears and sadness are precious to me.
There is nothing I'd rather do than just be with Stevie when he is sad, and I'm sure, that more than anything, God wants to be with us in the same way.
He wants to dry our eyes, and give us comfort and peace.
Will you let Him?
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God,which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)